Resolving Conflict From a Different Perspective

Coaching Conflict: Walking in Someone Else’s Shoes

argueAs children, we were taught to respect others and avoid conflict.  However, conflict is a part of everyday living and yet we look for ways to avoid it.  Conflict usually occurs when there are certain assumptions being made or unstated expectations not being met.  In all the years of coaching conflict, I see the avoidance, the resistance, the emotional toll and how much energy is lost when people do not feel comfortable dealing with conflict.

Coaching conflict situations at work can create a new level of understanding and increase trust with team members.  Coaching people to learn how to take the lead in a responsible way to clear up a conflict will increase your team’s performance, create a new level of understanding and increase trust with team members.

Here is a simple formula to use when coaching your team to confront conflict from a responsible position.

A Difficult Conversation Checklist

Prepare by walking through three conversations:

Conversation 1      What do you know ?

What do you know about your story of the situation, your feelings, your experience of the situation and what is at stake for you?

Conversation 2      What do you know?

What do you know about the other person’s story, their intention, their feelings, their perspective?

Before you decide to move to Conversation 3, stop and consider your purpose in having a conversation to address the conflict.

What is your purpose?  Perhaps you can decide that by looking at both your perspective and theirs, you see something that you did not recognize before when you were only focused on your own story and emotions.  What else can you do to let go and move on?

Conversation 3      Create a third story.

Describe the problem as the difference between your stories, including both viewpoints as a legitimate part of the discussion. Share your purpose for having this conversation and invite them to join you as a partner in sorting things out together.friends

When people experience you as not having your “fixed” position or agenda, they are much more willing to own a part of the problem and take responsibility in sorting it out.

Be sure to listen to understand their perspective and ask questions from a real place of inquiry and wanting to understand versus “prove it”.  Share your viewpoint, your past experiences, and your positive intention.

Most of all, stay open and talk about how to keep your communication moving as you go forward.

Warmest wishes, Barbara


The Leadership Advantage – Managers as Coaches in High Tech Environments



Coach Training for Professionals in Fast-Paced, High-Tech Environments!

Many industries today lack a sufficient supply of leaders prepared to lead in fast changing, technical environments according to the recent Global Leadership Forecast 2014/2015 Report.

The report goes on to recommend organizations provide acceleration programs for leaders in their leadership pipeline and provide coaching, mentorship and networking opportunities to develop up a leadership pool within their organizations.  At Source Point Training, we see many individuals choosing to gain these skills through our Fundamentals and Mastery of Performance Coaching certification training as they look to move up into leadership roles within their organizations.  Knowing how to communicate in a way that people respond, the ability to enroll others in a project so they see their role clearly – these are the skills of coaching. Effective communication, accountability, empathy, teamwork, leading with purpose and vision, and seeing beyond the technology are critical competencies for those looking to advance in high-tech environments.

Join us for a FREE Live Webinar Event with Master Coach Barbara Fagan

to learn how the skills of coaching will set you apart from other leaders

and make your job much easier and fulfilling each day.

Wednesday, August 5 @ 6:00pm Pacific

Register Today!

invest300Professional Coach Training is one of the best strategic investments you can make.  Companies like Google, Intel, and NASA realize that the new generation of talent is looking for guidance and the opportunity to share their ideas and contribute to new ways of doing business.  Managers as coaches learn to empower their teams to take more responsibility and build greater confidence.

Source Point Training offers an ICF approved curriculum that has been delivered over the last 12 years in the US, Mexico and Asia that assures you will develop the coaching skills to empower your teams to create winning results.point200

To learn more, please contact Ginny Carter, Administrative Director, at 800-217-5660 ext. 101 or email to [email protected]


5 Key Coaching Skills for IT Professionals

With Big Data growing at the rate of 800% over next 5 years and the exiting of Boomers in business to Millennials, there is an increased need for IT managers to coach teams to deal with a rapidly changing technology landscape and to implement strategies that will exceed customer expectations.

ComputersIT professionals are faced with increased demand for rapid responses – zero defects and cost containment.  They must know how to enroll customers and users, who unlike themselves, do not understand the technology they are using.  They must enroll IT teams in dealing with major IT change initiatives and develop ways to coordinate major projects that have many interdependencies and requires collaboration and coordination.

Source Point Training has provided coach training for professionals for over 12 years. We understand that in today’s environment, coaching is a skill that can accelerate the professional growth and development and career enhancement that leads to success.


5 Coaching Skills to Assist You in Moving Your IT Projects and Teams Forward

  1. The Art of Enrollment – Know how to enroll your team in a way that they understand the value of a project or its changes to create alignment.  Many IT professionals would be happy if they did not need to talk to users or customers.  Coaching your team to enroll others will make their job a lot easier.  Enrollment means being able to connect and relate to others then align on what is needed and inquire to really understand what others want. Lastly, to be able to confidently share how they will support the users or customers expectations and what action will be taken.ITmeeting
  2. Speak so People Will Listen – Learn to listen and speak the language of your customers and users and they will be more interested in hearing what you have to say.  Many people really do not know how to listen  – they wait to talk or share their point of view.  When we listen deeply, then we can respond to others in a way that builds trust and better working relationships.  Coaching team members these valuable listening skills will greatly reduce the emotional stress that is tied to many IT issues.
  3. Practice Style Flexing – There are many different personality styles, cultures and generations working together in today’s IT environment.  Take time to invest in learning different styles and coach teams to practice flexing their style to meet and match that of another.  When we can relate through our preferred preference of communicating and thinking, productivity will improve because of better understanding and relationship.
  4. Welcome Conflict – Coach IT teams to be willing to have a difficult conversation in order to clear up conflicts. When people are coached to deal with conflict effectively, then there is less conflict.  Dealing with conflict means they must be willing to put aside their “story” of a situation and be willing to see another perspective. Teams must be coached to look at ways to reconcile and reach alignment and be open to seeing new options and perspectives.
  5. Look Accountably at All Results – IT professionals deal in data and seldom see grey areas.  Coaching teams to look at all results from a place of neutrality will assist them in discovering more choices and options in order to prevent problems in the future.  This requires the time to sit down and take a look before moving forward.  IT jobs have a great demand on time and resources.  However, by coaching your team to take this time to stop and look at what worked and what did not work on a project, they will be better equipped in the future.

Source Point Training’s Fundamentals and Mastery of Performance Coaching is a proven coach-training curriculum approved by the International Coach Federation (ICF) that covers these coaching skills and so many more.  Learn to lead and coach your team to new levels and to experience more success personally by coaching others to win.

Contact us today at 800-217-5660 ext. 101 to learn more and join us for our upcoming webinar for IT professionals – details below.  Our next sessions begins October 16-18 in Phoenix, AZ.  Class is limited to 12 to provide for a high level of support and mentorship throughout the process from both myself and our faculty team.

Warmest wishes, Barbara

Join us for this Live Webinar Event with Master Coach Barbara Fagan to learn how the skills of coaching will set you apart from other IT leaders and make your job easier and more fulfilling each day.

Wednesday, August 5 @ 6:00pm Pacific

Register Here Today!


Becoming a Coach – The In-Demand “Soft Skill”

ICF Approved Coach Certification Training

No longer solely for those wanting to open a Coaching Business!

The coaching profession is growing rapidly with high demands for independent business coaches as well as internal coaches employed within organizations.

successchartToday, gaining the skills of a coach isn’t solely about opening a coaching business. Many organizations are now realizing the importance of “soft skills” as a high priority equal to trade or academic knowledge.  These skills are now seen as strategic capabilities. Businesses today must focus on creating relationships in all areas of the business which means a values-driven culture, great communication skills and the ability to collaborate and share ideas effectively.

The principles of Source Point Training have been coaching for over 25 years and have trained and certified professional coaches  recognized by the International Coaching Federation for 14 years.  Never before has the demand for coaching been higher and is now seen as a key leadership skill.

Source Point Training is not a “cookie-cutter” training organization.  Our Fundamentals and Mastery of Performance Coach Training curriculum provides a 141 ICF Approved CCEs and is designed in an way that also evokes highly impactful personal growth for each participant.

Here’s what makes us unique and a step above most other coaching schools:

Barbara Fagan, International Master Coach and Facilitator with over 25 years of coaching experience and an unparalleled passion for training coaches

An ontological coaching model that is both taught and experienced through the training process creating self awareness and personal growth

Introduction to Neuro-linguistics Programming (NLP) as a powerful coaching communication tool

Introduction to Emergenetics® Profile, one of the newest scientific assessment tools for understanding thinking and behavior preferences

A plan to launch your business platform or integrate coaching skills into your current environment

This year’s class will be limited to only 12 participants.  Call us today and set up an interview to see how coaching may be your next step to greater success.embassytempe

WHEN:    Training begins October 16-18, 2015

WHERE:  Embassy Suites Tempe – Phoenix, AZ

To learn more about becoming a Certified Professional Performance Coach and to request your interview time, contact us at 800-217-5660 ext. 101.

Warmest wishes, Barbara



This week, Source Point Training launches Open Enrollment for the next Fundamentals and Mastery of Performance Coaching.  The increase in demand for coaching continues to grow.  More and more business leaders are realizing the impact coaching can have on their organizations and moving towards embracing a coaching culture as a way of being in business and serving their employees and their customers.

treehandsPart of this steadily increasing interest from within the business community is the realization, especially with the growing millennial population, that developing the “whole person” is what most positively opens the space for innovation and impact to  their bottom line.  For so long, businesses have been investing in “professional development” focused on specific “hard skills” training and traditional “management development”.  Today, progressive organizations see that it must be a combination of professional AND personal development.

Below are a few excerpts from a great article written by Geoffrey James, Contributing Editor for, that highlights that innovation comes from personal growth of an organization’s employees and the 4 key ways an organization can nurture the personal growth of employees.  You can read the full article here:

1.    Create a community; not a machine.  I’ve sometimes heard leaders proudly describe their organization as “well-oiled machine.”  When leaders think of organizations as machines, they inevitably dehumanize employees either as cogs in that machine or “resources” that the machine must chew up and spit out in order to keep itself running. When leaders visualize an organization as a community of individuals it sets a completely different tone. It unleashes a flood of enthusiasm and energy. Employees feel free to grow into new roles in order to help the entire community to succeed.goofy

2.    Balance overtime with “undertime”.  Today’s pace of change is so rapidthat it sometimes feels like you’ve got to run as fast as you can just to stay in the same place, let alone get ahead of everyone else. Because there’s never time to relax, you burn out before you get anywhere.  It’s true that you’ll sometimes need to work overtime to meet deadlines or ship dates. To give yourself (and everyone else) a chance to grow, you also need to work “undertime” which means, well, goofing off.

3.    Provide training on life skills.  Many leaders consider training to be an expense. What’s worse, such leaders think training should be limited to job skills.  In fact, a company’s ability to take full advantage of good times as well as cope with the bad times requires employees with strong life skills: overcoming fear, managing emotions, building empathy, better communication, etc.  While training on job skills is important, training life skills can create those breakthrough moments where people transcend their limitations and grow into the person they need to be to move to the next level.

4.    Commit to your own personal growth.  When your company grows, the leaders either grow or are left behind. Executives who fail to grow get stuck in one job.  Successful entrepreneurs and executives are lifelong learners. They devour new information, seek new perspectives, challenge themselves to become the best they can be. [Personal growth] comes from spending time and energy on yourself. It comes from developing the courage to let go of who you think you are and instead transform yourself into someone better.

Organizations that see the value in supporting both the personal and professional growth of their employees are the organizations who are actively:

– Contracting outside certified coaches
– Hiring Internal Coaches
– Bringing in a coach training curriculum to promote coaching as a new approach to old school management

If you are interested in becoming a certified coach with an ICF Approved organization or feel your organization would like to learn more about infusing a coaching culture as part of their Training & Development focus, give Ginny Carter, Administrative Director, a call to learn more, 800-217-5660.  Check Our Website for more information about Fundamentals and Mastery of Performance Coaching and our next  dates.

Warmest wishes, Barbara


Learn to Manage Expectations


ToDoToo often I hear from the people I coach that they are “overwhelmed” and do not feel they are getting anywhere. They constantly get lost and off track because they have too many priorities. Sounds like you?

It can be challenging in today’s 24/7 environment where multi-tasking is the norm to stay focused and keep your eye on what is really important. Many of us can feel we are run by our e-mails and not by our objectives and goals.

Here are some coaching tools that I use with many clients who are in this situation of feeling over whelmed and overly stressed.

Get clear on your Key Focus each week and set reasonable targets. Look at your schedule and identify specifically those things that are important (but not urgent). Things that will keep you current and up to date each week.

Look at specific projects you want to focus on each week and evaluate how much time they will take.

Be able to look objectively at what really must get done in order to produce the outcomes you want. Use the 80:20 rule (80 percent of your outcomes come from 20 percent of your inputs). What tasks will create the greatest impact? Many times people talk about being productive, but they do not think about what will produce the greatest outcome.

Begin each day first by evaluating what you want to accomplish (results) by the end of the day and then update your “to-do” list.

Set aside specific time each day to check your e-mail. Checking e-mail can be habit forming and a great time waster. Scheduling it on regular intervals will increase efficiency and focus.

Lean to say no. When people approach you to take on something that is not involved with your key area of focus – learn to assess the real importance. If necessary, renegotiate a deadline that you can confidently meet.

Always spend time each week developing your relationships, this includes both work and at home. People want more balance between work and home but seldom stop to plan how they will create that balance each week.

At the end of each day, take time to acknowledge all that you did accomplish.CoreValuesTree

Last, but not least, always align how you spend your time with your life values. First, know what they are; health, spirituality, education, relationship. Learn to live aligned with your values by spending time each week living these values and you will experience less overwhelm and a great deal more harmony in your life.

Warmest wishes, Barbara

Creating A Winning Team!


Harvard Business Review recently published a story about coaching millennials written by Karie Willyerd of Success Factors an SAP Company. In it, sheHill gave an example of a young basketball player who showed up to play at an important college basketball game on a fabled rival’s court and had forgotten his shoes. At the next practice, he had expected from his coach a chewing out for not having his head in the game; but instead, there was an ice cream sundae party and another practice to help the team recover from the humiliation of their loss. That “kid” was Hall of Famer Grant Hill who told this story and his coach was Mike Krzyzewski of Duke University – known as Coach K and winner of over 1,000 games including a 1992 Olympic Gold medal and this week the 2015 NCAA Championship.

CoachK190Coach K focused not on defeat but on team building and getting the heads of young players ready for the next game. This week, Coach K demonstrated again the value of focusing on what is working and having the team play together by inspiring them to a vision of success and combining all their strengths to play their best.

As a coach, I recognize the importance of having a coach in any area of life. Today’s organizations are filled with Millennials (Gen-Y), the largest generation of workers since the Baby Boomers, and they have very specific needs in order to play their best game. We must learn to coach them in a way that works for their generation, who were raised on values around contribution and helping people not organizations. They want feedback and they want to be coached by people who understand success. They don’t
want to be “told” what to do; they want to be shown and inspired.GenY

The growth of Professional Coaching is an indicator of what today’s workforce is looking for in this way of leading and guiding people. Coaching is about co-creating a partnership that supports people in achieving their goals. Coaching increases self-awareness and confidence by identifying resources available and practices designed to achieve success.

Today, Source Point Training is working with many organizations who are learning to train managers as coaches. By creating a coaching culture at every level of the organization, they are inspiring and challenging people to continue to find ways to up their game!

Contact us to find out how to have a Leadership Coaching Skills for Managers training for your team today!!!

Warmest wishes, Barbara


Spring Training Starts Now!

BBallAs Spring opens its door to us – well maybe on the East Coast of the US just a crack – we begin to become more energetic; and looking at the months ahead, we begin to examine what is on our list of things to do.  It is the start of the baseball season, planning family vacations and those wonderful “honey-do” lists and projects.

For graduating college students, this is the time to prepare for the all-important “career” interview.  Colleges all over the US will be graduating what will become the next generation’s workforce.  Last year showed 7% increase in college hires and this year an even greater increase projected of almost 20% growth in college hires according to a recent survey conducted by Michigan State University.  What is driving this growth?  Explosive growth in telecommunication companies, motion picture and entertainment companies, financial and insurance companies and consulting services are the sectors of business providing double-digit growth for hiring college graduates.

Even with this demand, there are still things that all job seekers must do in order to secure that job.  Parents, family members and new college graduates – here are the best tips identified for achieving success in your job search and working with recruiters to land that job.

BpeopleToday’s millennials thrive in a less structured, informal work environment but that does not mean anything goes.  Lee Caraher CEO and owner of Double Forte, a leading communications firm based in San Francisco, recently wrote in her best-selling book, Millennials and Management – The Essential Guide to Making It Work at Work, “Business casual means that jeans are welcome as long as they are clean and cover your privates and they don’t have holes, frays or are cut/ hang so low that your tattoos or underwear shows.” That’s telling it like it is!

I had an opportunity to coach Lee when she was in her 20’s and a young account executive at a successful marketing communications firm.  Today, she is taking the lead by coaching her team of millennials to success.

Other best practices advice from Lee and others who are adept in working with the millennials include:

Work on your resume and cover letter – no typos or grammar errors.  Take advantage of Career Centers.

Your interview starts the moment you enter the door – even if you are waiting in a conference room for 60 minutes.Four different poses of one woman waiting for interview. =

Don’t bring coffee cups or water bottles or gum to your interview.
Research the company you will be interviewing with and learn about their culture. What has them be successful?

Get clear about your purpose for interviewing with this company and what do you want to know.

Have reasonable expectations when it comes to salary.  Find out what other grads are making in your business sector.  Be willing to pay your dues. While you have a college degree, experience is key.

Speak clearly and enunciate.  Use complete sentences.  Don’t end every
sentence with a question mark.Bthankyou

Turn off your cell phone.

Follow up with a Thank you – ALWAYS!

There are many opportunities out there, but there will always be standards in an organization for the type of employee they will select to represent their company and become a part of their team.

Warmest wishes, Barbara


Calling all Nerds! Yes, You!

Ever go to a meeting with a group of people you do not know and wanting to be your best self?  Of course; we always want to show our best side, but what happens when we feel insecure or not in control?  Perhaps we have been stressed with personal situations at home – things that we are working to cope with.  When this occurs, usually our Nerd will show up.

nerd300Who is your Nerd you might ask?  Well, it is the perfectly created behavior that lets the world know you are in control, confident and secure – while inside you feel just the opposite.  Think of it like your Super Hero Suit.  No one can “get” to you when you have it on and you have spent most of your life keeping your Nerd Suit in great shape.

The problem is that most of us don’t always know when we are wearing it.  It just magically come over us when we have these emotions of not feeling in control or liked.  When what we really want is approval and the feeling of confidence.  Others can see it very clearly – and many times people react negatively to us when we are being our most Nerdy self.

I remember when I first discovered this about myself many years ago. I was given some powerful feedback when I was really into my Nerdiness. Of course I resisted the feedback.  I wanted to explain why I was reacting the way that I was.  But when I really took the time to understand it – and not judge it – then I was able to accept that this way of behaving in challenging situations was really my way of protecting myself from not feeling adequate or not feeling that I had personal power.BeSelf300

Instead of resisting our Nerd, you can benefit by embracing that part of you that shows up in these situations. Of course, once you realize that you are being a NERD, then you can begin to shift and remind yourself that it doesn’t matter what people say about you as long as you really know who you are.  The more we embrace ourselves and the unique person we are, the less we will want to put on our Nerd suit and pretend we are someone else. The bottom line is we will always have times that we are a Nerd – learn to laugh at yourself when this occurs- it really can be funny to see yourself in this way.

Warmest wishes, Barbara


What’s in a Conversation?

With Valentine’s Day just behind us – many people had the chance to reflect on being in relationship.  One of the 3 pillars of a great relationship is the ability to communicate.  Having been married now for almost 33 years, there have been many lessons learned about the best way to communicate in my relationship.  First, timing is everything as they say. Also, it is not what you say, but how you say it that matters most.  Any relationship requires good communication whether it is with your partner, work associate, friends or family.  Many times our communication is generated based on the mood we are in.  Not communicating is another form of communication.  The reality is that we are always communicating in some way.  It can be easier if we have time and experience with the person so that we have discovered the best way to communicate.

Here are some universal tips on how to have the best results when communicating with others:

Think before you speak.  What is it that you want the other person to hear?  What is your purpose for communicating?  This could be making a request, giving advice or feedback, brainstorming an idea, solving a problem or showing your acknowledgment or affection for the other person. The purpose of your communication can be very broad so it is always best to stop and think about what you want the other person to hear and experience from your communication.megaphone300

Who will you be talking to?  This is where understanding different personalities and styles of communication can be useful.  Is this a dominant person or more quiet and reflective style?  Are they high energy with lots of ideas and excitement or more analytical and pragmatic.  Think about how they will hear you.  If you are talking to a more analytical style, then it is best to lie out the facts or the key points to make your case. Whatever you say, it must have solid logic and make sense.  If you are talking to someone who is more of an idea person, then talk to him or her about the big picture using colorful descriptions so they can visualize what you are sharing.  The Emergenetics Profile is an excellent tool to use when working with different styles to help identify thinking and behavior preferences when working with others.

talk300Plan a time to talk.  Many people in relationship at home and at work never plan time to discuss important issues. In today’s world, there are so many distractions that big issues can be put on hold until there is the “right” time to discuss and then never really get addressed until it becomes critical to discuss.  Planning an important conversation to have is one of the most accountable things we can do in our relationships.

Commit to hearing another point of view.  Many conversations start with an agenda and outcome that does not consider the other person’s point of view. What makes a powerful conversation is one in which all parties involved are committed to listening to and hearing different ideas.  When we do this, many times we have better ideas and outcomes and certainly more alignment and commitment to working together around whatever is being discussed.  Even if you are planning to have a difficult conversation, you can still feel confident that if you approach it from a place of neutrality and commitment to listen, you may be surprised what can be resolved.

Think about the many romantic activities that might have taken place this Valentine’s Day or how many proposals where made and how much time was spent preparing to pop the question.  For these couples, this will have been one of the first of many important conversations they will have.  Here’s to many more!

Warmest wishes, Barbara