Language Creates Your Reality

by Lou Dozier

Your Internal Chatter
Have you ever paid attention to the conversations you are having in your head? This self-talk can often be referred to as internal dialogue or mind chatter. This is the conversation you have that you are rarely aware of because it is so automatic. Your self-talk gives voice to what you believe about yourself, others and the world. All that internal chatter can either assist or hinder you to lead a joyful, prosperous life.
Your self-talk echoes the beliefs you have come to accept as true, such as worst case scenarios, things that happened in the past you expect to repeat, and “what ifs.” If your self-talk is compelling enough, you can actually scare yourself into action or immobility.

•    Internally: it is the constant commentary inside your head
•    Externally: it is the comments you make about yourself and what’s going on around you to friends, family and everyone you come in contact with.

Your self-talk can be empowering or deflating
We believe the things we tell ourselves and are unconsciously addicted to being right about what we believe – therefore ensuring that we create these beliefs. What a cycle!

Unfortunately, most people aren’t aware that it’s possible to interrupt and intervene in this process and create different results in their lives. Noticing your internal commentary is an important key in taking steps to change beliefs and create new realities. The more you recognize that you are not the story you are identifying with and telling others, you can free yourself to shift into empowered choice and action.

When you become aware of the language you are using unconsciously, you can intentionally choose to shift the energy to a more expansive way of expressing, thus raising your vibrations to align with manifesting what you want.

Common ways we use language to create pain:
Notice how language can create undesired states of being. How often do you think and say things that begin with these words? Repeat the words below and notice the feelings in your body as you say them out loud.
•    I don’t have time to…
•    I’m starving to death
•    My head is killing me
•    You make me sick
•    This person/situation is driving me crazy
•    “You made me…” (blaming others for your reaction)
•    My life would be better if only…(excuses and rationalizations)
•    I am…
•    I’m the type of person who…
•    I can’t afford to…
•    I can’t…
•    It’s too hard…
•    I’m sick and tired of…
How do you feel? Do the words feel constrictive or expansive?

We manifest what we give the most energy and attention to. Remember the Law of Attraction?
If you are using words that create pain and constriction, you will make them your reality.

Shifting Language
Shifting language includes recognizing that how you schedule your time is a choice based on what your valued priorities are in any situation.

Words like never, always and forever are constrictive and implies absolutes. When you find yourself using these words, ask yourself, “Is what I am thinking, feeling and saying really true?”

Shifting language is simple and powerful. You can start by replacing constrictive, restrictive or untrue language by challenging yourself to align with your truth.

Instead, you can say things like:
•    Sometimes
•    In some situations
•    I have had experiences when
•    In the past…
•    I have found…
•    It’s possible…
Words like: should, shouldn’t, need to, have to and “supposed to”…create the illusion that you have a lack of choice. You don’t! You ALWAYS have choice.

How much vitality and joy do you feel when you do things out of guilt, obligation or shame because you fear negative consequences. You may be afraid of upsetting others or risking the withdrawal of their love and being punished in some way. The result is a build-up of resentment, anger and frustration that ultimately becomes self-directed.

Shifting into the language of choice opens the flow to receive more of what you want. Repeat the words below and notice the feelings in your body as you say them out loud.
•    I choose to…
•    It’s ok to…
•    I give myself permission to
•    I allow…
•    I want…
•    I get to…
•    I love to…
How do you feel? Do the words feel constrictive or expansive?

Whether you want a thriving business, greater prosperity, vibrant health, a loving relationship or weight reduction…your thoughts and words are creating your reality all the time.

Start consciously paying attention to your internal chatter. Is it positively supportive or non-supportive? What are you repeating to others? If it’s non-supportive, how can you change your language to be more affirming and accepting?

2 replies
  1. Monica
    Monica says:

    Lou, this is such a wonderful lesson! As coaches we are trained to know this, but it’s so easy to allow this unconscious chatter to influence us negatively. Thanks for the reminder to make the shift!

  2. Dennis Crapse
    Dennis Crapse says:

    I have always believed in and been amazed by the power of words. This is a great reminder of that power. Even more so since it is dealing with this power within me. I find it amazing how sometimes I choose to be so mean to myself. I am still working on this. Thank you for this reminder.


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